05/12/16

Cruising at 40,005ft, after a 19 days trip from Australia, I’m on my way back to Singapore. I have this feeling in me, the desire of going home. The feeling of home arouse in me. I question myself, “then what about my plans to study overseas?” I looked up upon some photos of my mother and I on a vacation trip, and I started to worry about my mother. 

My mother doesn’t really know how to settle things and often end up in bad situations which is hard to get out from. She has trouble with certain issues in Singapore and I know it myself. She doesn’t like Singapore. I don’t know how to express this feelings. Also,my grandmother who has took care of me over a decade. She is getting old, she isn’t doing as good. Who will take care of her when I leave? 

There are many more I got to forgo, definitely one thing would be my taste buds that was built up in Singapore. Even if I can adapt it, then what about something more? There were many concerns that I stumbled upon. I can be selfish – to just run away from it but how can I bare to?

I sometimes just wish that life could be much simpler, where I could pursue my dreams and visions easily without any worries but no. Yes, I can settle down overseas and bring my parents abroad just like the movies, but can they adapt? My weak grandmother, she’s really fatigue. My mother, will have hard time adapting to the environment, whether in which the atmosphere and the weather.

I’ve asked. Asked many. Told my parents about my dreams and visions. But not my worries. 

How?

Advertisements